Archive for the ‘Movies’ Category

• Movie Review: Bring It on: Fight to the Finish (2009)

  Date: 2009.08.28 | Category: Movies, Reviews | Response: 0

  Trashy Black Girl Shakes Her Stuff, Trashy Mulato Girl Shakes Her Stuff, Trashy White Girl Shakes Her Stuff, Equal Rights Prostitute Shakes Her Stuff, Nondescript Retarded Female Audience Go Woo-hoo!, Nondescript Retarded Male Audience Caress Their Penises, What a Bunch of Crap.

  Worst… Scheisse… in a Long Time…

• Movie Review: The Incredible Hulk (2008) – Complete and Utter Failure

  Date: 2009.04.02 | Category: Movies, Reviews | Response: 0

  At the moment, I’m posting some old rants, reviews and the likes to my blog. Some of the stuff has just been lying around on different computers and desktops, some of it has been posted online, some has even been banned online (damn that dirty mouth of mine!), but whether it’s interesting or not, well… You be the judge

  Here’s one I originally posted on IMDb on September 20, 2008. At the time of writing, it’s still there, but you never know when some “user” will take offense and call it “abuse”, so here it is again: Read the rest of this entry »

• Movie Review: Reverb (2008) – Come on…

  Date: 2009.04.01 | Category: Movies, Reviews | Response: 0

  At the moment, I’m posting some old rants, reviews and the likes to my blog. Some of the stuff has just been lying around on different computers and desktops, some of it has been posted online, some has even been banned online (damn that dirty mouth of mine!), but whether it’s interesting or not, well… You be the judge

  Here’s one I originally posted on IMDb on July 15, 2007. At the time of writing, it’s still there, but you never know when some “user” will take offense and call it “abuse”, so here it is again:

  Had to stop this at 60 minutes in when they used Apple’s iVideo or whatever it’s called to turn a downloaded harmless video from 30 years ago into a completely different snuff video using an encoded song from 30 years ago. I know Apple make good software, but COME ON! And that’s just one of the numerous technical mistakes they make. This whole film’s plot is based on one factual error after another on audio production. If you know nothing about computers and music, this might turn out to be quite a fantastic thrill, otherwise it’s sure to tick you off. Plus, nothing’s yet happened, with 25 minutes to go. Nothing. Very stylish, completely empty.

• Movie Review: Wind Chill (2007) – For a Horror Movie, Great Character Buildup, Prehistoric Thrills

  Date: 2009.03.31 | Category: Movies, Reviews | Response: 0

  At the moment, I’m posting some old rants, reviews and the likes to my blog. Some of the stuff has just been lying around on different computers and desktops, some of it has been posted online, some has even been banned online (damn that dirty mouth of mine!), but whether it’s interesting or not, well… You be the judge

  Here’s one I originally posted on IMDb on July 12, 2007. At the time of writing, it’s still there, but you never know when some “user” will take offense and call it “abuse”, so here it is again: Read the rest of this entry »

• Movie Review: World Trade Center (2006) – Amazingly Uninspired

  Date: 2009.03.30 | Category: Movies, Reviews | Response: 0

  At the moment, I’m posting some old rants, reviews and the likes to my blog. Some of the stuff has just been lying around on different computers and desktops, some of it has been posted online, some has even been banned online (damn that dirty mouth of mine!), but whether it’s interesting or not, well… You be the judge

  Here’s one I originally posted on IMDb on November 5, 2007. At the time of writing, it’s still there, but you never know when some “user” will take offense and call it “abuse”, so here it is again (note the 100% agreement ratio. Sure, it’s 2 of 2 people, but we know what that means: At least two people on this Earth besides me don’t deserve to be killed just yet): Read the rest of this entry »

• Movie Review: Apocalypto (2006)

  Date: 2009.03.29 | Category: Movies, Reviews | Response: 0

  At the moment, I’m posting some old rants, reviews and the likes to my blog. Some of the stuff has just been lying around on different computers and desktops, some of it has been posted online, some has even been banned online (damn that dirty mouth of mine!), but whether it’s interesting or not, well… You be the judge

  Here’s one I haven’t posted anywhere, and I kinda forgot that I wrote this, but I vaguely remember being seriously pissed about the movie’s level of crappiness. Even if the “review” is badly formulated and very obviously more an outburst of rage than anything else, I must agree with myself from past experience that Mel Gibson is no more capable as a director than he is is as an actor. Read, “He sucks.” Anyway, this is the rant:

  A perfect example of a U.S. shitkicker deaf and blind to the values of any non-burger munching, Humvee-driving, bomb-dropping, guns-dont-kill-people-I-do culture (Mel Gibson) trying to make “wild people with bones through their noses” play out everyday cool-ass-worker-mom-and-sensitive-dad scenarios which leave your toes tied up in a hurting curl and your fists wanting to punch something out of shame for even watching something this ignorant. If not before, at eighteen minutes in, you know you MUST turn it off. So please do it, the crap won’t get any better, you know it won’t, and you don’t need anyone to tell you it will. Just turn it off and ask for your rental fee back.

  On a side note, I’m pretty sure I didn’t get my rental fee back. Does The Pirate Bay do that anyway?